How to get Children Feeling Good about a Move
Posted on 18/08/2014
Moving is very undesirable because it can be very stressful. Even though we are excited about moving into a new home and starting a new life but this feeling is often overshadowed by the thought of having to pack everything, move and then unpack.
However, moving is the most undesirable experience to go through to a child. Moving means a lot to a child. It means having to leave current surroundings and familiar faces. In many cases, your child may have to change schools, meaning that they will be taken away from the familiar faces of teachers and children. Friends will be left behind and this is one of the hardest things to do for a child. Your child will also be familiar with how things work at his/her current school, which provides a sense of confidence. However, moving to a new school will lower your child’s self esteem because they know nothing about the school, or the children in it. It is therefore perfectly normal to have a child retaliate against the idea of moving.
They key is to let them know as early as possible, allowing them plenty of time to get used to the idea of having to move. The last thing you want to do is spring the idea on to them at the very last minute. Your children will resent you for moving anyway, but they will resent you even more for not giving them time to say goodbye to anyone.
When you do eventually tell your children, do it in a calm and understanding manner. If they react badly to the news, do not go into confrontation mode and just be understanding and considerate towards their feelings. Allow the news to sink in and if they do end up storming off to their rooms, allow some time before you go after them.
Once they have calmed down it is time for you to explain to them why you are moving in the first place. Children, as naïve and innocent as they are, can be quite empathetic. Talk to your children and discuss your plans with them in a way that makes them feel like an active part of the family.
Ask your children about their concerns. It is the perfect way to help them overcome any jitters and to show them that you are there for them. Make them feel as ease about making new friends and settling into a new school. If you have ever had to change schools or move homes when you were younger, mention your experience and how you overcame any fears.
Allow your children to be a part of the move. Ask them to pack some of their own belongings like toys or books. This will get them excited about actually moving. Also allow them to make little decisions like how they would like their new room to be decorated and how they would like their furniture to be set out.
If they are worried about losing their friends, suggest other ways in which they can still keep in touch. Suggest slumber parties or sleepovers to show your child that they do not have to miss out on their friends.
All of the above are hints and tips that will allow your children to feel a lot better about having to move. It may not be an easy transition, but if you remain calm throughout and allow them to adjust in their own time, you will see that your child will come around rather quickly.
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